Last night, I sent the final draft of The Hero (or Big Project, or BP) to my critique buddies Doug, Oline, Austin, and Jen. On the 19th, we will get together so they can tear it to shreds.

In the meantime, I have vowed not to even LOOK at the BP until the 18th, on which I have taken a personal day for the sole purpose of reading the BP aloud to my cats in one sitting, making line edits and marking rough sections. I’m hoping the time away from the BP will lend me the distance I need to read the thing with an objective eye.

I was looking forward to today–my first day unshackled to the BP! I was anticipating two weeks of freedom to work on all the other projects knocking around inside my head. I’d get a start on my next book.  I’d write tons of blog posts. I’d catch up on emails and apply for grants and become a more organized, efficient person.

None of that has happened. What has happened, between releasing my BP yesterday and sitting down at the computer today, is that I have become somewhat depressed. It’s harder than I thought it would be to cut myself off from the project I’ve been working on every day for the last year and a half. I know those damn characters better than I know my friends. I know all the plot twists and the subplots. I could draw you a map of the town. I’m not ready to let it go!

I can’t wait to have my BP back.

Posted in: BP

4 thoughts on “Withdrawal.

  1. osutein says:

    Imagine how much worse it will be when it’s getting published 😉 Then you really can’t have it back.

    I guess there’s always sequels!

  2. helensayers says:

    “I know those damn characters better than I know my friends.”

    Woah. Truth. That statement gave me chills, Lara. But, congrats and relish in your “doneness.”

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